Reassessing my Expectations

Disclaimer: I'm a big baby. Proceed with caution.

There is a fundamental and universal pattern in the way people name objects; they are generally named after the function they perform or the service they provide.

For instance, computers compute, irons iron, bakers bake, and coaches coach. This is even true in different languages. For instance, jugadores juegan in Spanish.

There is a point to this, I swear.

Once every couple of weeks, I manage to cut a chunk of time out of my oh-so-busy schedule to lug my bag of dirty clothes down to the laundromat of my dorm. This is no easy task; girls wear A LOT of clothes over the course of two weeks (especially in the winter). Multiple trips are inevitable. The laundromat of my dorm isn't inside the building but rather in the common area between two dorms. And did I mention I live on the 4th floor? On a given laundry day, I could make 6 separate trips to the laundromat and back. And don't get me started about the limited availability of machines. There is no mercy for people who leave their clothing unattended in the machines when their cycle is done. To top it all off, it costs $1.25 a load per machine! It costs me over $7 to do my laundry every 2 weeks, which comes out to about $130 a school year.

Now, I have two very simple, but essential, expectations when I finally make it down there. They are as follows:

1. Clothes will be washed when I take them out of the washer.
2. Clothes will be dry when I take them out of the dryer.

Usually my first expectation is fulfilled. My clothes come out smelling like Tide and that's how I like it. But the second one is another story. You see where I'm going here.

My laundry recently got out of hand because I was a few days overdue for my laundry day. I was dreading making the epic journey down to the laundromat but I put on my big girls pants and made the trip. I have a system for getting the clothes down there and in the washer; I even have it timed right so that I will have time to fold each load after it comes out of the dryer just in time for the next load to come out. It's a beautiful thing.

Clothes in, detergent in, cough up some money, and - BAM! - spin cycle. Wait 35 minutes and throw them in the dryer. (Remember, you have to be prompt - no mercy.) Fabric softener, cough up some more money, and - POW! - halfway done. 50 minutes later, you have dry clothes.

Or so I thought. Everything was going smoothly until the last step. I was already on a tight schedule to get to work on time so I had the cycles timed perfectly. I went down to get the my clothes expecting dry clothes.

Needless to say, they were not dry.

I have discovered there are many drawbacks to quasi-dry clothes. First of all, they no longer smell Tide-fresh. They smell more like damp dogs. It is also very difficult to get the wrinkles out of non-dry clothing. But I think the worst part about my endeavor was the towel. Wouldn't you know it; drying off with a wet towel is not the most effective method and highly unpleasant.

Moral of the story: don't do laundry.